So my shaver died while I was trimming...ya know. And now it is half way done. I don't think there's currently any aesthetic in keeping it this way...
Cool, see you soon... she just admitted to her friends that it was a queef.
So can I buy you a drink sometime?
Sure, but make it a double, I'm drinking for two these days.
so I told him I hadn't been laid since Bush was president. Right after he cums, he says "Welcome to the Obama Administration".
found POGS while I was cleaning my room this morning. Definitely bringing them back to school to turn into a drinking game.
On your way out, lock the front door. And by lock the front door, I mean find the door handle, reattach it, and then lock it.
She told me she loves her boyfreind while she was giving me head. He must be a nice guy
I just masturbated to a Jock Jams cd. What have you done today?
Are you still feeling it? I'm in the bathtub. The water doesn't work but it's okay because I'm wearing pants.
Some crack addled fool from the sketch ass motel behind the restaurant just gave me a flyer for an AA group when I was on my smoke break. I don't do mornings
"my nose is broken but I'm beer pong champ so it evens out really"
I am so sorry. Not sure for what, but whatever I did last night probably merits an apology, so I'm covering my bases.
I'm not wearing pants, but I'm wearing a tiara.
We got to the hospital and the girls who caused the accident had already added you on facebook.
She's got a shotglass necklace, running down the street asking people to "fill her up". Get here.
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