Bisexual people are plain selfish.
We were making out in the bushes when some dude comes and starts peeing beside us.
and i do it all in one night. I'm like santa but a whore.
he made a joke about you fucking his daughter...i think youre golden
I just remember her telling me "Hi, my names Kaissa and I'm a lesbian" over and over and over and over again as I was crying.
I've been crying in my room listening to Billy Joel for 2 hours. Thank God Four Loko was banned.
Who is this?
You offered to lift up your dress at the bar so I could see your lower back tattoo
Um, I think that was a general offer to everyone. So...who IS this?
the repo guy said it was the first time he'd ever started to repo a car with someone fucking inside of it. he might have said 'doing it' instead.
therea a video of her dad walking in while i screamed "lets have a fashion show!" and fell off the table
First table when you walk in. Can't miss us. I'm wearing a feather boa and a green hat
You had me at first table
We should just do therapy together, clearly we have all the same issues. It's why we are friends.
He still texted me and invited me over a day later so I guess I'm the lovable kind of psycho
There's no triumph quite like finally banging your high school boyfriend 6 years later
How did I end up in some random dudes car?
Some guy came up to you and asked if you knew how to drive stick.
Sorry I can't pick up... thought process is fine but too stoned to form words.
Randomize
