I'm sorry, but there's just something about mesh over nipples that irks me.
Quoting wale wont save you from herpes
Oh and discovery of the day is it's the channel, not the time on your cable box. Thought it was 2:16 for 4 hours
soooo we both peed the bed last night...
I just peed next to my dog in the yard. Unparalleled forms of bonding going on over here.
DOWN HORMONES. BACK.
Dude she let me install handle bars on her headboard. I should have nailed my boss years ago.
Best line overheard at the bar: "This is the last time I'm shaving my ass for him...I mean we just broke up".
I made him dress me after we fucked. He put me in TMNT pants and then told me I looked hot.
Ended up in some house where this dude has a $1200 leopard cat
I ended up snorting coke while wearing a Bavarian dress and I feel like I need to reevaluate my life
Why is there a business card for people who need bail bonds in my wallet...
just because i'm not a monk anymore doesn't mean I need to tell you about my new sex life.
which is fantastic by the way.
He went down on me and then made me breakfast in bed. He's a man you can bring home to mom.
please don't ironically join a cult
Randomize
