i am watching brooke knows best right now and hulk is totally dating his daughter's look a like. it is gross and disturbing.
the most pressuring question is, why are you watching brooke knows best?.
you ever feel like there is a sober person insided you pointing and laughing....?
The smiley face on that pregnancy test is so damn taunting. It's like it's laughing at me for my poor choices.
the only good thing about these hospital visits are the free pregnancy tests
he's like a stage 5 clinger and he won't even fuck me. he has to be gay. my personality isn't really THAT great.
He legit pounded my cooking wine, because he was to cheap to buy beer. He is so not getting any.
I only made out with him because he cured my hiccups
He is now tagging himself in my pics from last year where he is barely visable in the corner. i feel like he's marking his territory.
i had a threesome. one of the guys used to bully me in high school too for being gay.
If you're in the liquor store 5 minutes before close, and you have to ask the cashier for a coin to flip to make a life decision because "vodka takes you to a bad place," you need to reevaluate your life.
All I really remember is thinking that the music looked like beautiful lizard waves in my head
ever had one of those days where you say fuck it and lick the inside of a bag of chips
I mean I want to be happy but it's a train wreck that you can't look away from
You put THAT much Jager in me and expect me to realize when things are a bad idea?
The text I got from my boyfriend this morning: "babe, I'm not mad because I know you were drunk, but you kissed 3 guys last night and I wasn't one of them".
Randomize
