Yeah, we realized keeping you in a cage wasn't beneficial to us
when im not freaking out about dying alone and unloved, i actually really enjoy being single
did you seriously just ask me if there is such thing as a sophisticated batman shirt?
Aw lol. Sounds like my masturbation injury last year
With the drought our water bill is skyrocketing. No more shower sex, masturbating, or pretending to be under a water fall after smoking a blunt.
It isn't possible and the very mindfuck of that concept gives me a lady boner.
He wanted to drink hypnotic from my butt crack. I need to move out this state.
oh you know, the usual stuff. getting kicked out of bars and sleeping in cars.
I just tried to roll over and fell off the bed. I think that is the beds way of kicking me out
Told the cab driver to take me to narnia last night. Turns out there's a bar called narnia on the south side of town. We are in business
My brother just text me asking if I was ready for the blowjob of my life.
I tried to feed the cat bread. I told her it was the body of Christ. That seemed to work.
You don't have a cat...
His family, without saying anything, started a game of quarters the moment the drinks arrived. I love them. If only I didn't hate him so much.
Come get me...at gazebo by side entrance....im passed out in a bush...this is a Bar A bouncer texting for your buddy
wait he has a twin??? which one did you fuck
yes
Randomize
