fighting downstairs. join me tonight to hear their makeup sex. also, let's make skittles vodka.
like literally i think i'm sweating out semen right now
please come get me his dick is out. i'm sitting on his couch and his dick is out. come now
My gaydar just like overheated and exploded watching the male figure skaters on the olympics
And the cops told us we were all naked.
His concept of male bonding is doing lines in adjacent stalls.
I've already started drinking so the earlier you get out of class the more coherent I'll probably be.
I fed him pizza in bed. I'm probably the best one night stand ever.
Second wind. Either that or my heart is about to explode. I'm hoping the first one.
What's the mantra for Sunday?
I will not have sex with him.
So apparently they remodeled our middle school. Looks like we'll need to find a new roof to play beer pong on this summer.
I'm not going to say what I did. You're smart enough to figure it out. But I did it. And you owe me 20$
I'm sorry I never said I wasn't coming home last night. To my defense I did type and send a text, only I was too drunk to realize I sent it to the guy I was with instead of you.
There were a lot of gay moments in between the Strippers and coke
She told me I’m a “stunt cock.” I’m okay with that
Randomize
