It all came flooding back to me: there was a woman with one hand
So there is a chick dressed up in a vagina costume handing out free condoms next to the dude handing out free Bibles and preaching about sin. I love college.
The 30 seconds of sex was almost worth it...I mean he did smoke me out and watched the princess and the frog with me
I found out that my first kiss was an Italian. Even in kindergarden i knew size mattered.
Aw c'mon. You have to see if the spinning penis rumor is true.
The Ex's are trying to talk to the GF. Game face bro.
Hey history final, how's it feel to be raped in the ass by my steel cock of ACADEMIC PERFECTION?
you are way too vulgar to be a girl
She can't meet us until 830...there's no hope for our sobriety at that hour
Pretty sure I'm going to hell because of our friendship
Last one there wins
I know. But whatever I'll just eat cold pizza and play with my cats by candlelight
We need a shit load of segways right now
I'm glad your nude photos turned out "classy" but you cannot hang them in the living room.
They offered me pot brownies in 7 minutes flat. Imagine my horror when I had to be like, are those gluten free?
DUDE!!!!! THERE IS A MIDGET HANDING OUT RICE KRISPIE TREATS!!!!!! WHERE ARE YOU WHEN THE COOL SHIT GOES DOWN???????
you bounced a quarter off my butt and it came back hitting you in the eye. karma, bitch.
Randomize
