i can juggle bunnies
cool
on fire
at this rate if someone im actually interested in likes me back im going to die of surprise before i even get to make out with them
you really should stop posting my phone number on craigslist as tranny seeking tranny, last night i answered at family dinner and almost choked on my hot dog
do you not see the irony in that??
Apparently faking a threesome isn't as much fun as you'd think
I feel like she's the kind of girl who always ends up with guys who have oddly shaped dicks..
I took my exam the next day still drunk and failed, but I kno for a fact that I filled in the bubbles for my name perfectly
I should just black out in my front yard again- that was a great nights sleep.
I fucked her wearing an American flag. Now here I am, awake, naked, and flag less. How do I report this to the police?
can I share that I'd like to fuck him in my new car as a sort of car warming present to myself?
If we don't rescue him from the fat chick soon, she is going to eat him alive and suck the marrow from his bones.
I mean, you've seen me eat pizza, sober, out of a garbage can, and yet I refuse to go eat at that place. Just sayin....
Can we both just take a day off just to have sex? Is that acceptable as an adult?
PS there is a naked boy in my bed and I just left for the bar...
No. There is no way we have to stoop so low as to ask your dad for weed. There has to be an alternative.
B. I found a note on my phone and all it says is 'Fuck yeah im a racecar'
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