he was so hot that i framed the used condom. it's not trash, it's art.
You were mumbling a lot and offered me 20 dollars to leave you alone
Hey, I can't get ahold of Tommy. Let him know his ex-girlfriend is pregnant.
he aimed his bare ass at the sparkler, farted, and it really did work...i love 4th of july anal fire works
we did it on the golf course and he threw the condom in the pond. some poor fish is gonna choke on it
do you actually have a paper bowl full of broken glass and ecstasy or was that just a dream?
The girl behind me in psych just tapped me on my shoulder to tell me there was a condom wrapper in my hood.
I WILL MAKE A FLYING LEAP FOR YOUR DICK WHEN I SEE YOU THROUGH THE WINDOW
Just got offered to exchange moonshine for manscaping services by a gay guy. I'm gonna have the smoothest back in St. Louis county.
Is it weird to say that Kobe reminds me of a wise brontosaurus?
well one of us has to be wrong and it's not going to be me
I have an ideal penis or slightly above ideal penis in every country that isn't ruined by the specter of communism
Be there in 20. Want icecream?
sex. I want sex. I like where your heads at though.
You smell like a steam boat captain.
Whatever your on right now, I want.
i gotta say this to some one...... my penis feels sooooooooo sooooooft, its amazing
like for real, sooooooooooooooo smoooooooooooooth its amazing
I can't wait for you to read this text tomorrow
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