If Jon and Kate can get divorced...how hard can it be for me?
To bright to open both eye. Get pizza and put in feeding tube so i can sleep more
At least you're going to bed with all the teeth you woke up with
I'm looking at pot farms on google earth. Google should be proud I found a real purpose for it to serve.
Don't mean to be rude. But did you, by any chance, cut down a tree from my neighbors backyard last night? And did you also drag it to my yard and burn it?
MEET ME OUTSIDE YOUR HOUSE IN THREE MINUTES. BE DRUNK. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
Russians do not operate on the same level as the rest of us. hoping I wake up tomorrow
Its a little weird going to a wedding where I've screwed the bride and my wife has screwed the groom. Great wedding though.
You took my underwater blowjob virginity.
You said you'd make me a thank you card for taking care of your drunk ass. I'll be expecting that monday.
I actually cannot wait for your visit. I miss people who make me look like the virgin mary in comparison.
Please brint me miilk. I am on the floor but my door is open. Thank you, i appreciate u verry much.
at least I have the sex noises of his roommate to entertain me while I wait for him to wake up
I'm gonna write a book. Almost Awesome: all the times I ALMOST got laid.
I just didn't expect to have anal in a retail store at 9 AM on a Tuesday.
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