C thinks vomiting on the batroom floor = reaon not to party. Lies. Party continues.
my dad just told me that a lesbian kissed my mom at a bar last year
she came over and started getting naked and said its not like i came over to just hang out
youve hit the jackpot
he poured tabasco sauce in my vag.. I'm still having a hard time going to the bathroom.
Yea went to the bars and he called me 2 hours later with random people saying he is at a place that i don't think exists
Im sitting alone watching titanic. Drunk. Without pants. Holding a fishing pole. Im pretty sure im okay with all of this.
I just went to pick up my pigeon from your house. You should be getting a picture soon
hey give me heads up if you're feeling vulnerable tomorrow night
Stand up sex. Extremely, extremely difficult. I now know how pointe dancers feel.
As a matter of fact, I am on the treadmill with the Bottle of UV Blue as we speak.....
After seeing all of the pics during the trial, all I could think was "her vagina doesn't look THAT dangerous"
In light of this week's heat-wave, we are having a house vote tonight on the temporary suspension of the "no smoking indoors" clause. Please bring your voting cards to the living room at 6:30pm
Point of Clarification: by "voting card" we mean a full beer and/or shots
I have to hand it to her. In my heyday I took home the 'biggest shitshow of the night' award 9 times out of 10. But I passed the torch on to her last night, and she went skipping merrily far and away with it into the enchanted world of aggressive alcoholism. Is this 30?
I watched a compilation video today of a guy banging his sex doll to edm music. I just had to tell someone.
remind me again why we thought drinking hungarian moonshine was a good idea
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