So. Did i wake up at 430, try to drive home, stop to throw up at a shell, and try to clean out my car and drop my keys in a full dumpster? Yes.
The nice sales man at 711 gave me a handful of free lighters for buying a carton of cigarettes. I guess the depressed damsel in distress look works for me.
I guess we had a small kitchen fire somehow when we decided to bake fruitroll ups and croutons...
Well apparently "don't come inside of me" wasn't one of the English phrases he understood! On the bright side... At least he will get his green card for having an american kid!
We've shared an experience, my friend. I, too, have talked on the phone with a parent while giving a handjob
I CAME AT YOU WITH RAW FEELING
you grabbed my dick through my pants and hissed at me.
I finally looked at the pictures from last night thanks for feeding me and pulling my pants up
When a guy wants to eat something off you and then comes back with microwaved strudel and custard, back the fuck out. I have apple-chunk burns on my tits.
only i would grind with someone to harp music at a gay wedding
We haven't been trashed enough to shut down a bar together in four days. I'm starting to worry that we're growing apart.
One last thing: he lists glow sticks and tacos as things he can't live without. How would we not be friends??
I remember grabbing your ass. So firm. So right. I don't regret it.
COME HERE AND I WILL SUCK YOUR COCK UNDER THE LIGHT OF THIS BEAUTIFUL ELECTRICITY
It's 5am and I come home to you naked on the kitchen table and 3 people I never saw before fucking on the back porch ... and my weed gummy worms are gone. fuck you I'm taking your mom's offer
it was the most awkward makeout ever. it was record breaking really
...i feel like you have a lot of those.
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