I woke up this AM and all of my clothes i wore last night are gone. Instead i am dressed in air jordans, boxers, cargo shorts, and an Affliction t-shirt. the part that upsets me most is that i was with a guy who wears Affliction t-shirts.
I think I might be in your shoes. Except they are actually my shoes. Either way these shoes are wasted.
i tried to get you to come inside, but you insisted on throwing up in the flowers "because they're pretty."
Your brother just informed me that half a mouthful is a unit of measurement. I love talking to members of your family.
can't make this up: he's writing lyrics for the musical reenactment of how he met her @ an anime convention to perform at their wedding. yes, there'll also be dance routines involved.
I'm still in shock that he came by my house for five minutes dropped off a Teddy bear and went to the strip club on valentines day
So I vaguely remember making out with you this morning, I think you were on a date?
Cuz its complicated and I hate complicated and I miss your penis
Update- I sold my hat to some drunk kid for 50 bucks. I used my earnings to buy beer on the way home. I realize to everyone else seeing me drinking on my balcony at 6am, I look like an alcoholic, but I'm thinking of it as a night cap
It's like refusing a bong hit from michael phelps... You just can't do it
And then you told me I had large hands and looked like a girl who would have an illegitimate child that I never talked about
We were fucking and his phone rang and it was his grandma. He just had a conversation with his grandma while fucking me from behind. Then his dad called and asked him what he wanted from taco bell.
On a serious note, don't let me forget to tell you about firecracker baseball. I'm glad I have my fingers. I had to count them.
Yeah, so if you ever try to steal it, just know my tongue's been on it in several occasions. All over it.
Basically we had a threesome in one room and a fivesome in the next room. Its what I like to call a win win situation.
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