some old guy just shit himself in my section. everyones leaving
I think it's just because she's got "I'll sleep with anyone with a decent car" written all over her face.
It's like sleeping with someone you met at a karaoke bar. It's never okay.
He had to pee in the sink beside my head because the girl that I was taking care of was passed out on the toilet. To answer your question: yes i took a peek. Thats why we hooked up later.
I just took a shit in a BP station. It seemed appropriate since they are shtting in our ocean.
She said I looked exactly like my dad. Then she made out with me. Should I be questionable?
I blacked out after running into my soc TA in the beer garden. came to dancing on the speakers at major lazer and making out with said TA.
I was so exhausted I thought about using my deep throat spray to stop my coughing.
This hurricane was the perfect excuse to buy 2 pounds of animal crackers and a case of beer. It's on Sandy.
...I can smell the alcohol on your breath through that text
That moment when your fucking in an airport bathroom and forget to lock the door. That poor man...scarred forever...
When you wake up with a bow tie and mustache drawn on your penis, you know you had a good night.
You -do- realize there are other things to talk about than just how different parts of you smell like pussy, right?
Hey bro are you still alive??? I'm sure you are wondering how you ended up laying on the floor at the foot of your bed and why there is a wheelchair by your door....
...hi
YOU SHOULD BE ASHAMED OF YOURSELF
Ok cool I was afraid you'd never speak to me again. I can work with this.
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