Uhhh...do I owe you any money? Or an apology? Or anything?
she went to pee and i could hear her singing "Drip Drip Drop LIttle April Showers" from Bambi through the door.
Careful when you walk in I'm laying by the door.
his teacher called to say he gave a girl on the playground a rock to touch his penis. proudest moment of my fatherhood
Just walked into the bathroom and looked straight ahead and made eye contact with a guy taking a shit through the crack in the stall door...
Listen I'm a sentimental character under all this alcohol and ratchetry
so my pro life roomate found a used condom wrapped up in her sheets with your panties. never letting you have sex in her bed again
Some toppless girl just walked past me in the hall and gave me half a carton of smokes. I have never been more aroused.
just had to get on my knees to snort an addy off the little sink at the daycare. teacher of the year!
Well at least ssomeone is or the state is tafing over ir in twligiob
Damn it. If you ever throw me again, take video.
Long fucking story. But hey I got an orgasm and breakfast so I'm winning.
Is there a tactful way to ask "how are your balls?" Or do I just ask point blank
No just a list of 20 of my favorite things
Where are penises on the list
Where am I on the list
Under penises
So, 'head before the store' turned into a fuck fest, & that's how I ended up at the grocery store smelling like a cum farm on Black Friday. How's your weekend?
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