For some reason, Oliver from Hannah Montana reminds me of pudding.
That's cute.
and hes going back to rehab like me, so we have common interests
If I don't wake up hungover in a ditch Monday morning I will consider my halloween a failure
she got the salsa and pickles out of the fridge looked at me and said what can i make with this
I can't figure out how to get this beer bong in my carry on without airport security questioning me as it goes through the x-ray.
I had to drink a couple beers this morning so I could attend the keg race. Hangover had to dissipate or it wasn't happening.
All I want is a camelback full of Jameson and the weather to be cool enough for me to wear rainbow spandex. Ugh. Pride problems.
it went ok. then he slept in a parking lot and took me out for a picnic the next day. boys are confusing.
My mom opened up my bank statement today....my first alcohol intervention class is at 7:30am tomorrow.
I'll have party bus drop you off in the morning.
Can we just discuss how hundreds of miles away we were both beyond drunk and in some boys bed. That is the definition of friendship.
So to recap Superbowl Sunday - I won $100, bumped into the anti-christ and his cult, met a guy in a kilt and a wican, then got invited to a gayguy afterhours party.
Gonna be tough to beat that next year!
So hungover. I dropped my keys and leaning over seemed a terrible idea. Instead I took my shoe off in the middle of the street and use my toes to pick them up. Think I'm a genius.
I had a dream last night you were Aladdin. I think due to me watching 6 hours of Disney movies and the fact you told me you were wearing a vest.
Dreams are coming true for both of us.
I found your dog. Now we are bros, so he is staying. Don't call, don't make it weird.
The joke is on me because whale penis is forever in my search history.
Worth it.
Randomize
