Yeah but his hole really smells sometimes
Just met someone from Jersey. No fist pumps or jagerbombs. Kind of disappointed...
So I just googled the ten commandments... Were fucked.
We are not in the same countries and I heard about your hook up last night BEFORE you.
I slept with a married guy last night and then broke my toe on the doorframe on the way out. I've never seen karma work so fast.
I guess she thought her walk of shame would be more dignified if she stole my dog
She just had to change the song on the radio cause I was tap dancing on her windshield
He's drinking 50/50 vodka/water out of a camelback. Disaster would be a compliment at this point.
So I don't know, I'm not a doctor, but I might be juggling dates with 3 different guys...
Fuck I forgot the furry convention was this weekend and now I'm downtown. Way too high for this shit.
I got propositioned to get involved with an engaged couple. I told them I didn't think my married couple would like me to see other couples...
I just got CPR certified, don't make me need these skills so soon
So help me God.... if he sends me a dick pic.... I will make it so he has to eat food through a tube in his nose and poop into a bag by his belly button
He ate me out while I was playing bejeweled. It was the greatest moment of my life.
he was wearing pj pants, thank you for not letting me go home with him
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