Is it possible to jerk off a nipple?
and when i put it inside her she yelled "welcome aboard!"
Omg. There's def a kid, like 10 years old, sitting in a buggy at wal mart holding a sign that reads "I can't behave"
Do you ever just KNOW it's gonna be a good day? I mean, like in a "just found a Vicodin in the bottom of your purse" kinda way?
Our cab driver just admitted to beating up kids in the 60's who didn't smoke pot...
She dresses cool and she's mean. And she has fake boobs I feel like I can relate to her on so many levels.
If it makes you feel any better, I had my finger up some guy's butt today... Dominatrix training, ya know...
I got a 5 dollar bill, 1 condom, and no alcohol. I get payed on Thursday. Let's do this shit.
In local news "Man Stabbed With Golf Club" next person who tells me this is a safe place to live gets punched...
She called to say the cops were not fake cops. some one has to go get her in an hour
Everyone is all excited about the iPhone 7 being water resistant and I'm only concerned with whether or not it can be destroyed by salsa or cum
You gotta have 1 orgasm for me and the rest can be for you. I'm living vicariously through you 😂
I made an executive decision to rename my Resume file to something other than MONEYMONEYMONEY.
Our Uber driver pulled over to show us Tinder some dick pics. Top that.
he's figured out my code; what are you doing = I haven't found a better dick yet
Randomize
