OMG. Drunk.
I'm so glad you fill me in on these things.
Sorry. Must've been trying to twitter.
i wonder how he feels talking to my mother about jesus with a condom on his dick
i will never coherently bang her
had to check his id this morning to remember his name.... i was wayy off
Yah, I definitely wouldn't wanna be fingered with a fake arm...
Thats stupid. Your future is a life of less pay for the same work. Free drinks is how capitalism reimburses women for its inequality. & youre not even taking it!
I got drunk enough that when camel suggested jumping off the pier, I thought it was a fantastic plan. Also my blood hurts.
I Can't even believe I threw all my pizza rolls at her, I mean not only did i ruin a good meal but now I dont have anymore
The dorm caught on fire so it turned into a 5am pool party
I was jumping over your garbage can screaming "Im a snow cat!!" ..Who wouldn't want to see that?
I just watched a stripper purchase $43 of Rockstar and corn nuts. Godamnit! We need helmet cams.
You know you hit Mardi Grad bottom when you come to in someone's kitchen on the floor and you are eating gumbo out of a Mixing bowl with a ladle......yeah rock fucking bottom
Get here now. I need a drinking buddy. I don't care if you're in a different timezone, it'll be five o clock here faster.
I think I just saw my socks in the parking lot.. gonna keep walking
only 4 hours until nug lovin time
excuse me?
nug lovin. lovin nugs.
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