Def gonna have stinky sex sometime soon. GOT TO! she has eligible friends for you, as well.
I might come over and watch a movie but I can't spend the night. my parents would wonder where i was
you're 26.
Congratulations on your moose knuckle.
Thank you. Really, it was an honor just being nominated.
Henry's handball, Tiger Wood's Car Crash, Roger Federer losing ... That's it....I'm throwing my Gillete away
Babe, I need to be clear. I DO NOT WANT TO HAVE ANAL. Never. No anal. No "talking about it"
We just threw our carpet out of our room. Via fourth floor window style.
That's okay, during storytime I would have to sit on my hands so I wouldn't touch everyone. Explains a lot...
ttyl tear gas
Her vagina smelled like pancake batter. That's all you need to know.
I have no idea how I got home or why I am naked but I assume I owe you a thank you...
I think shooting the BMW with the bow and arrow is when our group became the evening's antagonist
speaking of festive, i made out with a guy in a leaf pile last night. happy fall?
The fact that I made out with a twenty one year old father is kind of worrying me now. Like. This is exactly what I wasn't supposed to do in life.
I noticed it at one point and thought do I really wanna bang the guy with the phone holster .....of course I do
I am sweating Crown. It all went wrong when the ratio hit 50-50
Randomize
