Well I thought that next 8 ball would either kill us or turn us into Gods
I just remembered Dan asking me all polite in the middle of sex "do you mind if I get behind you?" that was the most polite way I've been asked to do it doggy style
Its sad we have to plan out fun a month in advance. 30 sucks.
he told me I talked like a deaf person
My room should be renamed "Land of the Misfit Condoms."
I woke up naked in my own vomit. Not even in my bed. No one is happy.
Frozen waffles and wine. Loneliness-party of one
I just ran into the married chick you banged 2 years ago at our apt! She asked me if I could get her coke! Memories bro. Memories
We can't be fuck buddies. You stare into my eyes while we fuck.
if all that ever happens for the rest of forever is drinking wine and eating popcorn, ill be okay
Sex with him is like pizza, it can be shitty but its stillll pizza.....
Should I be scared that after we hooked up she took antibiotics with Sailor Jerry's?!
so like what it comes down to is do I wanna look like a boss ass bitch or do I wanna masturbate.
So that guy from plenty of fish has a lightning bolt tattooed on his face. I kinda feel like I HAVE to sleep with him now.
oh i see... well this is a positive first step in you courting him for sex.
Randomize
