my history teacher totally just suggested that we record his lectures and play drinking games with them later so that we pay attention to the material.
he has officially spend more money on me than any other boy. and its all gone to plan b. awesome.
Reading in my econ of energy textbook about the US' largest oil spill from the 1990's.. guess i can't sell this one back either
This is worse that I thought. He's playing violin for me.
He doesn't belong with God. He belongs face-down in a pile of his own excrement, vomit, blood and semen. Then pissed on by Satan.
Fun fact. I am at the police dept. getting served a warrant for unpaid ordinance... and the officer was a one night stand from like 10 years ago.
I think as a general rule I have to have blacked out somewhere at least twice to be comfortable.
thank you for being a reason not to completely check out of my life and start sleeping all day, crying all night, and living off vodka acquired through credit card debt
No ambien sex tonight. I just ate two hotdogs with chilli and onions.
she came into my car to rip lines with our blow dealer as I was writing my essay on anti drug policy, i call it on site research
True friendship: When you can hold your best friend's hair and still eat your Stromboli at the same time.
Her four year old daughter walked up to me grabbed my junk and said "this will be in mommy later." Wtf?
She's sent me the same nudes using the same gestures and positions... It's like she has a template for her sluty-ness
p.s i need to stop drunk texting my mom. she brings up text convos all the time and i have no idea what shes talking about...
Here when you come to your senses come back here and I'll fuck you back out of them.
Randomize
