so i just googled the prescription for aldara i saw on your desk this morning...
I just watched the Dark knight, Maggie Gylennhaal looks like Katie Holmes after a stroke
Omg Kevin Jonas is engaged!!!!!!
Omg really? To who. Gay marriage is only legal in like 3 states.
If I could have all the money back from the pregnancy test i've bought- I could buy myself a vacation.
Or a large amount of condoms?!?
Motor boating, judging by the amount of lipstick I found I would say between 6 to 8 times
some guy i've known for a week sent me nudes saying "you're welcome" i need an award for this birthday
czant get you from the arport. sry i found the rum. dan sucks at rumpong jusrt so yo knoqw.
He just texted me asking if I remember pinching his eyelid shut with my eyelash curler.
I was laying there trying to sleep and then he sat up, took out his dick, and put it on my shoulder. It wasn't even hard- it was just casually perched.
I'll be home next weekend. Its mothers day. Let's party just enough so we are frightened it might be our first
I'm gonna take a crap in the portashitter like a civilized human being.
Getting drunk at 9 am is not a super power.
Personally, I'm gonna be Sexy Dobby the House Elf.
got cock blocked by the cops again. two of the cops were the same ones from that t bell incident and they recognized me... they still dont like me
I just puked into a clean basket of laundry.
Randomize
