Reasons why i shouldn't be drunk and upset: i'm going to a boy's
I didn't talk to you tonight because I've decided you look like a man.
i can juggle bunnies
cool
on fire
Can you send me a pic of you vag, I'm sexting the guy and he wants a pic but I didnt shave
dude are you serious?
I know you already have a pic on your phone
you kept yelling 'bird cage' in between songs and finally the lead singer stopped to ask if you meant 'free bird' and you said 'fuck you, i'm not gay', needless to say you were kindly escorted out
he doesnt exactly give off the "im mature enough to use my penis" vibe
it's pretty bad when you go in bed bath and beyond and recognize 6 different bed spreads you've had sex on
Currently separating the burrito I just stuffed in my purse from the weed in my half smoken bowl that was already in it. My what the fuck moment beats yours.
No, i will not have sex with him again. It felt like he was trying to bulldoze his way through me. My vagina is on strike.
Did I seriously kick a door down last night... And if so when where and how hard, cause that shit I do not recall.
I feel like I should throw some tampons around my workspace so everyone will know what's really going on
I SHOULD NOT BE HAVING AN EXISTENTIAL CRISIS OVER PIZZA
A picture of a damn cupcake brought back 3 fuckboys
not only did he puke in his mouth and hold it.. He also sneezed while doing this
Yeah. Broke it off. Saw her cheating after she forgot to turn her zoom off. Ring=$$$. Not making that mistake-priceless
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