This kristen chick is fuckin nuts. She's pyscho. She's a trainwreck. She carries baggage. She's... Perfect.
So... 5th graders can't whisper for shit, but apparently I have an awesome rack.
Haha. Niice.
Yeah, I didn't know whether to be shocked or flattered.
both.
you decided to have a spaghetti fight but then you got greedy and decided to eat it all.
My piss changed color midstream. Think that means I have a 50/50 chance of passing the test?
Dude we need to petition the city about running buses later, none of my booty calls own cars
She refered to her bed as the "cockpit"....I understand that this morning.
I am willing to take shots of vanilla extract. That's how this night has been.
sorry for allegedly lighting the beer pong balls of fire
he said good things come in small packages and I decided to hook up with someone else
I buy a new bowl every time I get a new guy. It's retail therapy.
congrats on being the token straight people in our group.
I'M HANGING OUT WITH THE DRUG DEALER UPSTAIRS JUST SO I CAN STEAL HIS WIFI PASSWORD, I HOPE Y'ALL LOVE ME.
i just really want to fuck a guy wearing lederhosen
it'll be sexier than it sounds, i promise
Wanted to let you know I hooked up with your brother.
i thought he was gay wtf
My law teacher drew an elephant on the board in class. I was so high that I laughed for 5 minutes straight. Nobody else laughed and everyone stared. 130 people knew I was high.
Randomize