I got date raped at Sigma Chi last night!
Dude, you never made it to Chi last night. You fell into a tree and passed out.
a dead guy is trying to sell me oxy clean on my tv
just served this dwarf dude an entire pitcher of malt liquor. watching this will totally be worth my bartender's certification.
once i realized i was actively trying to drink the beer i was sweating out of my body i knew it was time to go to bed
They sext over her pic comments. Role playing as wolves.
At one point they were sandwiching me, both petting my stomach, mad dogging each other. Then they somehow telepathically decided to both try to pull my pants down. Such nice guys.
I think they were making kool-aid in my bed. There is lots of sugar and my hands and face are stained blue.
This chic sharing the cab with me just started givin me head. I'll be an extra 5 minutes.
Old woman told me I looked like her son and then she started explaining to me how she wanted me to fuck her
I just want my birth control to stop making me feel like I'm watching baby seals get clubbed to death any time anything even remotely unpleasant happens lol
I bet my lungs hate me more than my liver
That's a hard toss up
Then he kissed my hand sensually and said "you're a Black Queen. Don't let anyone tell you different."
I'm going to get high and eat ice cream until the pain goes away. You're welcome to join.
So much for no-infidelity-fridays....
He put your tit in his mouth. Professionalism is out the window after that.
okay valid
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