dude, that chick is coming to see me and stay for 2 nights. I'm hitting the 3rd in the trifecta of friends.
You're one hell of a depraved bastard dude, I'm borderline speechless. You officially win.
They all have matching tattoos so they're all official bffs. I love my life.
so we'll all just be running around naked, basically. and high.
I just had to take a drug test for my new job. I should have asked them if they could tell me if I were pregnant or not while they were at it and save me the guesswork.
From the prices on this menu it looks like I have no choice. I have to blow him.
What do you mean how did you end up there? You told him he had a face you'd like to ride, that's a deal sealer in any language.
Aww. I feel like I need to kill a puppy just to make room in the world for how cute you are right now
Sometimes I hate my life and then I remember I live in the WORLD CAPITAL OF RUM
The best part about passing out on the floor was the fact that when I pissed myself, I didn't piss the bed again.
So I stappled myself into my toga... that should be interesting getting out of later tonight...
Let's be honest, I am pretty sketchy looking.
Nothing says "back to school" like walking in the first day with a hangover
I stole a tiki torch last night and just returned it. Things have been better.
Talking to a customer about getting high and staring at glow in the dark wheels while there is a cop in the store. Just another day in Tampa
Well this guy just went into a detailed lecture about how rinos are developing into unicorns.. It's gonna be a good night.
How was your night?
Good. I made people cry and run home
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