: south campus drug res life name erik. Love, tran
She said she could kiss it, just not put it in her mouth. Because that would be cheating..
All she gave me for breakfast was raw toast. How can she expect me to eat raw toast?
You mean bread?
Just got new surround sound speakers for my computer... I feel like I'm actually IN the porn now.
She said she never had to courage to go fully shaved. Since when did shaving your snatch become courageous?
the first call I got in the morning was from visa fraud prevention so yeah it was one of those nights
i think its awesome that according to your mom i'm your friend that caught on fire.
Lesson learned. Never get fingered on an airplane.
im standing in line right now while the 711 manager calls other locations to see if they have the john cena collectors slurpee cup in stock...yep i need to get laid
I blew him and did charles barkley impressions at the same time. what a pro
This guy on the bus keeps leaning over and sniffing my hair.
Was it just me or did you also find it awkward when "glad you came" started playing on pandora right after you finished?
Pizza rolls are incredible. They are like sex, except I have them sometimes
I've been called an asshole for a lot of things in my life, but I never thought it would be because of potatoes
being serenaded is actually kind of awkward 2/10 do not reccommend
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