I saw him at work today and he gave me a really awkward "I know what you do drunk" look...
I Just realized that having a picture folder that says "not for mom" may give off the wrong impression to wondering eyes
the brownie started to kick in before i finished the essay... it became a race against my own increasing intoxication
Ive created a fbook group called "threesome" and invited two girls. Im not going to say a word and just see what happens.
Alright, so what's my next move? I already posted a Milli Vanilli video on her wall
Congratulations on your lack of fetus.
we all thought you were asleep. he found you an hour later sitting outside in the snow lighting a bowl, singing the CatDog theme song, and hugging a box a Franzia.
Being in the club with your moms drunk friends > having a healthy relationship with your mom
250 people in this lecture & my prof asks who already drank green beer this morning& is drunk right now. I WAS THE ONLY ONE TO RAISE MY HAND
Considering we're about to fuck, I really need your girlfriend to stop liking all my Facebook posts.
sex on a roof was cool and all but that superhero argument was the best part of the night hands down
It's 7:30pm and we've already lost someone and had to run from the cops. What the fuck did you put in the punch?
I can't find my keys and there's a hotdog in my purse.
yeah we're all naked, and I think we just shaved Chad.
I made you bacon and gave you a blow job. I'd say you had a pretty great day.
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