I GPSed you we're an hour and 14min away from each other
and it's going to stay that way
I dont know why people are racist. Both the mexicans and the irish gave us holidays where everyone drinks on a wednesday.
He was going nice and slow, then he yelled " BOONNEESTOORRMM!!!!!". I can't walk straight.
Obama is so hot when he ends wars.
I just woke up to pictures of every angle of his dick I'll ever need to see.
I'm standing in line at the liquor store and they're making popcorn.
And if it was a miscarriage you should figure out whose it was. He must be an alphamale for his offspring to sustain life this long in the amusement park that is your body
Dan marino should def buy this ambulance. But not this one. I'm gonna fuck this ambulance up
I have no idea. But that is beside the point bc in vegas I'm a pro vball player from Ireland and a veterinarian on the weekends
Like her Facebook page isn't even hers. It belongs to her tits. It's Titsbook
I mean he gave me an 'I owe you an orgasm' fist bump
Thats not real though. Slash there are other extenuating circumstances to lead me to believe dick is wanted
HOLY FUCK I SPELLED EXTENUATING RIGHT ON THE FIRST TRY. IM THE BEST DRUNK NA
Sara can't come to the phone right now. She's currently having an in-depth conversation with a flower pot.
I woke up in bed spooning a vacuum cleaner
From now on I'd like to be known as Rampage.
Randomize
