By the way the awkward moment from yesterday is now a bad situation I have to figure out.
Thank you Grey Goose.
She tried to keep her legs crossed last night while doing a keg stand. Way to keep it classy.
how can i incorporate a boy scout uniform into what i do tonight?
There's a stripper banging on the door demanding to see you.
on the way to the hospital you kept asking if we could stop at the bar first. then you proceeded to puke out the window
Im coming down to miami this weekend
We shall drink from the everclear river
Fate is real! that hot chick, Megan just showed up dressed as jasmine and I'm dressed as Aladdin this is going to be cake
I may have had sex with him and told him we wasn't worth my time then went home and made mashed potatoes
DRAW HIM A PICTURE OF SOME FUCING AWESOME THING. LIKE A UNICORN OR SOME SHIT. FANTASTIC.
I understand, but unless there is an intervention for me being planned, i DON NOT want to talk about my life choices
I rubbed his back while he puked for an hour and then ended up getting laid when I tried to put him to bed, best puke and rally I've ever seen.
Just met my French neighbor. We watched a crow die together, so we're pretty tight.
How hard do you think it would be to make a drinking game out of a Slip-N-Slide? Asking for a friend.
I think my fortune cookie is telling me I give good blowjobs.
I woke up this morning and my house is covered in shredded cheese with my laptop open and a google image search for "awesome shit".
Randomize
