I have two black x marks on my hands.
Yep you got cut off last night after a stripper bent over in front of you and you screamed very loudly 'I can see your soul from here'
damnit I wish I could remember that.
i saw a stretcher and literally ran around for 10 minutes telling people it wasnt for me
he let me wear his jacket and there was a magnum and a bowl in his pocket ... I think im in love
She stole my hamster. idk who she was, she just walked in and said she knew Keith so she stayed, drank 6 beers, and then stole Charles.
I have blocked the memory from my mind. He is just a fuzzy cloud floating with my other bad decisions..
Does anyone know why "math wizard" is written on my arm?
Moment of the day: as we leave the restaurant, she reaches into my pocket, pulls out her panties, and angrily marches to her car. I felt like a sketchy magician.
I mean i can't really be mad...either way i was gonna fuck him or hate fuck him, so it's basically a win/win situation.
Looks like a took a video of myself beating off and passed out last night. I'm classy.
I feel like if anyone knew what an affection erection looked like it would be you
I just woke up drenched in beer, in a puddle of beer, and cuddling a bottle of tequila
I'm just going to take a nap and hope I wake up more attractive.
This morning, I found 5 naked people in Steve's bed with post sex hair, and Steve fully clothed sleeping on the ground.
so i was thinking... those 6 am shots weren't really needed.
If you wake up, and some of your hair is singed off, it probably has something to do with the lit cigarette you put in your hair. You said it could double as a bobby pin...?
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