Is it morally objectionable to repay my debt to society with drug money?
I may or may not be drunk driving a golf cart. Vegaaaassssssss.
the red, white, and blue power rangers were all also in the porn buisness, good bye childhood
We went to red robin and there was a 15 minute wait so we went and fucked in the car. Quickies, endless fries, and a mascot handing out balloons- this is literally the night of my dreams.
So, you didn't have time to come pick me up but you did have time to get plastered and then write "champagne money" on every one of my statuses for the past month?
A donut and a mojito for breakfast...Helloooooo Derby Wekkend!
I'm 99% sure I high fived a girl over mashed potatoes last night
Okay well someone asked "IS HE HOMELESS?" about me so I need to try and find somebody.
I get credit on the assist, you can thank me by taking a pic of her ass under the covers and sending it to me. It would make my YEAR
it will be an insanely irresponsible summer.the only things i plan on not doing are dying and getting pregnant.and even those are negotiable
How many vodka infused gummi bears count as 1 drink?
He threw me over his shoulder and carried me outside, all the while drinking from the bottle of rum he was holding, while my ex watched. I'm winning the break-up.
Do you think I can get away with quoting Work Bitch by Britney Spears in my speech?
I would go disguised as someone he didn't have premature ejaculative sex with but I don't know if I could stay in character.
I just realized that this is the first time I've ever seen your mom without sucking your cock.
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