we're taking shots every time my dog licks his penis. we're on number 8 now.
you should have been aborted.
We all need desperate help. Maybe we should just become a group of people who walk around town and shit in peoples air vents
I'm down.
let me put this in terms we both understand. he was the crunchwrap supreme of men--the perfect combo of all things manly, gooey and delicious. and ready for instant enjoyment.
she said they gang banged her to "who let the dogs out." the dude left of the middle barked along. sounds like a good time.
As a matter of fact you told me i fulfilled your "woodshop teacher fantasy"
Every fourth of July I get sentimental when I think back to the one where we drove around baked off our asses crashing multiple cookouts listening to Team America's "America, Fuck Yea" on repeat. I miss us.
I'm just sayin' man be careful, that chick has castration written all over her.
OH DEAR GOD. He looks like if u licked him he'd taste like bourbon, sex and sunshine.
Well at one point he got ahold of my archery gear.. And I. Shit. You. Not. Sarah took an arrow to the knee.
We're just Facebook friends. Use guy logic. I tapped your wife in high school, 20 years and 60 lbs ago, when she was hot and experimental. Why would I mess with that now? It would ruin the vivid memories of her that I keep in my spank bank.
I will find you...
I'm treating this like a real date. My boobs aren't even out.
I'm so proud, I have tears
I'm beginning to think that women just have dogs at home as an excuse to leave ASAP after hooking up, without sounding like a typical guy.
Can you please help mom and dad? Theyre trying to figure out Skype, and its like 2 cavemen finding fire.
You spent the whole night conversing with your zombie poster, so I'd say you were pretty far gone.
Note to self, the correct response when a guy tells you he likes you as a person is not "ew"
Randomize
