YOu come back ASAP and we will do whatever you want baby
How the fuck did you go into work today? You are a better man than I. I couldn't even show up to being unemployed on time.
they just did a mariachi cover of free bird
The chance that I have herpes may have made me find god
After the tests come back negative, you guys will look back on this evening with fond memories...
Tis a story best told in person, it involves a golf course, police and vomit
It usually does with you
He fell asleep and they duct taped him to the floor. He's pissed.
For future reference "I'm too drunk to come today" is an acceptable line to get out of work. I love my job
I said geronimo as I came I'm not sure if he appreciated the doctor who reference or was just confused
That's not your dick yours is smaller. Nice try.
Wait why do you have a pic of someone else's dick in your phone?
Do you think I shall pursue this journey to the center if the dick?
I may or may not have just let Ash Ketchum capture my wild Pikachu in a parking lot.
Sarah was butt-chugging wine and diarrhea'd all over the wall
You sat on me. Like I was a toilet. While I was on the toilet. You peed a little.
also, when i showed up he started talking to me and eventually asked me if the girls treated me well. i went on to talk about my sex life. he was talking about his secretaries.
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