physics? naw man, teacher told us it was casual friday, so i decided to be super casual and not go.
it was almost as awkward as hearing my parents on friday nights in 2 in the morning starting, and than hearing at 2:01 my dad getting up and my mom going "i should have married a man"
I hate myself for saying your mom and I have the same friday nights.
don't worry... so do I
the bank didn't screw up, i spent 150$ at mcdonalds last night
Disgusting. If I saw her naked my dick would pack up his balls and leave.
Fuck buddy has no power. Invited her over to use my shower. I love hurricaines.
I find out next week of the Australian was lying about his vasectomy or not. Keep your fingers crossed!
Judging by the garbled spelling in the calendar reminders in my phone, drunk me really wanted sober me to take a pregnancy test today.
She got called into work early but she left me a note that had directions to her roommates stash of weed on top of a two bacon and egg mcmuffins. I think I win.
you missed 2am bagpipes and my roommate looking hot as fuck in a kilt
Not now. Out of camp chairs. Carving a new one with a chainsaw. Mushrooms are starting to kick and I gotta get this done NOW.
Be happy for me... Or horny... Or be a really good friend and feel what I want you to feel. Jealousy
I just saw your brother in some random persons yard climbing a tree. Just saying.
Probably on drugs.
I enjoy the company of your penis
But the real reason your aunt is drunk crying is because she has already had four margs and went for a 5th and someone is trying to stop her
I've been in town for almost 36 hrs and I haven't made out with a stranger yet - I consider THAT a record!
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