you told me to make out with him to promote the social success of the sorority
We just watched planet earth in marine bio. And our prof told us that was all we were doing on 420
I love online classes. Spent the last part of my lecture taking apart a teabag and filling it with weed.
Homecoming wouldn't be the same without all the drunk old people puking on the street.
But she tried her best to break my penis, so she has a few free passes with me
I'll pull you in a wagon. You'll have a sash and a crown on and we'll sing "All the Single Ladies"
Last night was the twilight zone. We hungout with our 45 year old future selves and tried to fuck everything with a dick. Lets move forward from this.
my head gets it he sucks but my LAME FUCKING HEART IN MY VAGINA doesnt
Hickies on top of my hickies. I need a leash and/or a positive female role model
Katie told the cabby "when the boat docks I'm getting off with you"
She lost her glasses and we found them on the roof. Don't ask questions. Kings cup was intense last night.
The more I think about it, the more convinced I am that I'm the solution to all of T-Swift's guy problems.
Hey now one little girl thought it was cool I was covered in blood. Apparently according to her Mom she wants to be a surgeon when she grows up
I need to get some goddam control over my hormones
And when were you going to tell me to stop dancing on his coffee table singing "come on irene?"
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