tagging him in all 73 close-ups of your cleavage might have been a little obvious.
im trying not to drink and cry in the same night anymore. i'll let you know how it goes
i'm ready for this baby to gtfo so i can get coked out.
her cat was choking so she kept trying to stick her finger in her cat's mouth while saying "it's okay kitty, just do what mommy does"
Do you think the party boat will still go out if there is a hurricane?
The manager of the bar we were at the night before came to my house today giving me coupons. Apperently you and i won karaoke night which is a prize of 300 beer dollars. No idea what beer dollars means nor do i have any memory of doing karaoke but lets go back tonight.
I'm wearing cowboy boots and showing way too much cleavage to be in a place with no jaeger.
What can I say, your life is charmed. I'm on the couch trying to decide whether or not to puke again.
My roommate made me a peanut butter and sprinkles sandwich. Maybe tonight isn't that bad
She just shoved like three McNuggets in her mouth and started sobbing and I have no idea what's going on.
I am walking funny today. And it's sad because it's from the bad encounter with the sidewalk rather than a good encounter with a stripper
Just had empanadas for breakfast while watching Wall-e with my yesterday's one night stand mother AND grandmother.
Being sober is no fun. Karaoke and not wearing pants are not socially acceptable things to do anymore and this depresses me.
I impressed him by taking off my panties without removing my pants.
if I dont text you back in 10min assume i am in fact still dizzy and injured myself in the shower. and call an ambulance. thanx.
Randomize
