So his roomate was eating breakfast when I was sneaking out. He's the guy I took home from jessicas wedding. I ended up eating coco puffs with him
Just another sign I need to get out of this town
If it makes you feel better, you're better at taking it in than ass than she is...
Well...yeah actually, that does make me feel better
And hes hitting me with his balls, really hard.
dude so we were eating nacho cheese popcorn and chasing it with cole slaw
by the way nacho cheese popcorn is me making popcorn and then adding milk butter and mac n cheese mix
I found a phone book at the party and started calling everyone with my last name asking if they wanted to form a club. I'm meeting one for brunch tomorrow...
I did a hand stand against the glass wall at Ziggy's with no panties on and got 3 phone numbers. Thank God I shaved this morning...
I'm going to give blood tomorrow. Prepare yourself for pictures and a cynical poem about the heart and its level of tangibility.
So what's going on?
We hit boys town to get stupid. I mean invading Iraq stupid.
When the sex is so good, you need three fans and have to chug a gallon of water after
I need a moral compass that doesn't always point to dick
With great boredom comes great irresponsibility.
Please tell me you're not on their roof again..
My mom always wanted to raise a classy lady, it just turned out to not be her daughter.
What happened last night? I'm too scared to get out of bed and see the destruction.
First of all, check to see if that naked guy is still alive. He didn't look to be breathing when I left
Hey does the gas gauge in your car work?
Nevermind...we figured it out. Heres a more relevant question, does your insurance have roadside assistance?
Currently standing at the bus stop in just a pillowcase and its fucking snowing
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