ive decided theres a fine line between accepting money for sex and letting someone buy you late night taco bell and knowing that if he hadnt you wouldnt be in his bed right now
a pedometer??? no beatles?Steve jobs just took a dump in CA and it landed on my heart
Dude, she knew her leg was on fire and she kept dancing. Bad-fucking-ass.
I have tardy slips. and absent slips if you don't show up to the bar. and trust me, if you are absent there will be a saturday school. I'm teaching you how to drink tonight.
i wish i coudl send you meat via computure
sudden memory flashback: you and i having sex on the bed, erin sitting naked in your desk chair drinking whiskey straight from the bottle while harassing you for your computer password to play some "mood music." high five. go us.
Haha I will however wear glass and and draw a lightning bolt scar if you want to have sex that way, and that can be the only time you can call me Harry.
He was going down on me as I discovered a spaghetti-O on my boob. Its been a while since I faked it.
I'm just saying. If this how my magic vagina shows it's magic then I don't want any
I'm pretty sure my intestines are bleeding but I'm still going to Orlando to catch that orgasm.
I feel like I would find myself in so much trouble if I hadn't married my DD.
Gonna play a drinking game called drink til I feel my emotions. The things I do so I can be a therapist
Omg one of the midgets from last night just added me to Facebook.
Do you think you could cook pancakes while i blow you?
SHE POOPED THE CONDOM WHOLE
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