I'm still with the girl from last night. remember to call me conrad and that i work for PETA
I just wasted my iTunes Gift Card on a season pass for Hannah Montana. Bad decision?
I have been running off of weed, alcohol, and Mexican food. What is Tallahassee.
Family bonfire. I just discovered my cousin drank an entire bottle of champagne at the age of 7. I just got showed up.
In a car. Threw up in my mouth. Haven't said a word in 10 minutes.
I drink way too much to have a type. Last weekend I picked up a guy who calls me "baby girl"
I FEEL like I celebrated someone's 21st, but really I just celebrated Tuesday.
This is actually a pretty big deal for him. I mean, he contacted a stranger out of concern for someone else instead of for sex.
That does show growth.
I have this rep as a wingman for a reason. I'm like a poon caddy. "You might want to use a 9 iron on this hole. "
Also, totally got laid in my yellow rubber boots and it was awesome.
I think I'm pregnant again.
or as we call it, thursday.
The way I see it, there's 2 types of friends. Those you should do drugs with, and those you really,really shouldn't.
I just got promised sex at a fire station tonight so basically all my porn star dreams are coming true.
Did you make it home alright?
No I'm sitting under a tree by a cricket. He's alone crying out for someone to Fuck him. This guy gets me.
I'm so hungry and so lazy that I'm seriously considering ripping into that packet of cream cheese in my nightstand.
Randomize
