I can't get into him, he looks really young. I'd feel like I was blowing the Gerber baby.
After I talked about my ex for about twenty minutes, she just listened, sluts are so understanding
So what's the moral of this story? Aside from 'lesbians hold grudges'?
she told me she was pregnant in a never have i ever game
You two kept repeating the same thing over and over. It was like looking after retarded pull-string dolls.
I don't care what anyone says I want strippers at my funeral.
Sun* burn. But that sounds like wait.. Midsentence thought... It would be like swimming in a giant bowl of cereal.. Only I would be cereal. This is brilliant.
I remember three things: you falling down an entire flight of stairs, me stripping out of your Christmas one-sie to do cartwheels in my underwear, and people standing above me saying, "where did that bump on her head come from?"
Also, I was told I kept the antlers on the entire time. I'm deeming last night a success.
This is God's way of telling me He loves me and wants me to be a cocktease.
Go forth my daughter and give blue balls to all who may gaze upon your tits.
How do you tell someone who's buying a pregnancy test to have a nice day .... Like how
I had 2 bags of iv saline fuilds for brunch and the buffet at the strip club for dinner. happy easter.
as he was bent over the toilet, he turned to me and said "barbarian kyle is much stronger than regular kyle" and then went right back to puking.
You added his wife on Facebook?! You're horrible at this mistress thing
I frew up on some kids lovely sidealk chald drawings..
Tell me I'm drunk and you have to come get me. It's usually true. They'll believe you.
Randomize
