I just saw how many times I called you last night. You're welcome.
he smelled like listerine and beef tacos
Horny girl and non horny girl have different views on life
i kinda regret how quickly i gave it up to him, but i just wanted the regular fucking to begin soon. ah we made good memories.
five cans of playdoh and a game of guess whose penis ...
those kids just got delivered to the party by the pizza guy
My mom wants to know what to send you in a care package. She used cat emojis, so you know it's serious
I'm going to sing sad and lonely Barbra Streisand songs at the top of my lungs if you don't get here soon
I don't remember where I was but I remembered that I hated everyone there
All I know is that I woke up with glitter all over me and blood on my shoes. It wasn't my blood.
I think my body knows it's dying and is just shutting down
Just burnt my tongue. Not sure if it will help or hurt giving blow jobs
Where does dick fit into Maslow's hierarchy of needs?
I love FaceTime, every time you ring me the morning after its like I went home with your one night stand too.
Hey long story short Grandma needs bail money.
Randomize
