So one buddy got tackled at the urinals by national guard members and was arrested. Another had sex in a port o potty with possibly the drunkest girl I've ever encountered. The rest of us blacked out and won a few bets. So yes, the derby did meet our expectations.
He wore a Medeval Times crown while I gave him a BJ
The question is do I invite my fuck buddy to my graduation party now that my girfriend found out about her?
We were trying to sober you with hotdog buns but you refused put half of it in your bra and said you'd save it for later
"it's Wednesday" isn't a good enough excuse to take my debit card and use it for your own drunken needs. You owe me 250 bro
I swear to god, allah, buddah and motherfucking oprah winfrey... if I have to stay here any longer because you are holding us up I will choke you out.
I almost had to fight a bird, and you know how scared I am of birds. It found that Percocet that I lost in the grass last week, I threw out my back when I launched myself at that little fucker.
some how during sex we caught an ENTIRE pillow on fire. A WHOLE PILLOW.
she opened a can of olives, drained the juice and poured ranch dressing in. oh and 'croutons' (saltines) on top...
Their first impression of me was that I was completely naked. So yeah college hasn't even started yet and I'm already that person.
I think my dove chocolate wrapper just told me to masturbate.
All right, sex is off the menu for you. Now you just get friendship. So I can spend marginally less time being annoyed by you.
No, gay couples have the same problems straight ones do; I wish that we could go back to the days when he would shit with the door closed.
So you're not opposed to us ever having sex again? Because it just seems like such a waste to let a penis like yours go.
Got upgraded to First Class and now I’ve got the whole Pacific Ocean to seduce the very hot gentleman sitting next to me!!! Door closing, wish me luck!
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