Well douche your snatch and let's go!
The guy asked if i had a problem w/set schedules
He asked about stds. I told him I don't have any... which I don't. They are now called sti's. Whooopsie
Just because he's a soilder doesn't mean his dick is a hero.
What's the sex policy on a school bus? Because I dibs back seat.
Sex allowed. Dress code is neon and obnoxious.
We are gonna die. I wanna enforce the "no jumping out of moving vehicles" policy. And how are we gonna get a school bus through mcdonalds drive thru?
The strip clubs here are like a safari of penis, and I'm gonna bag me a rhino.
By the way anyone who is willing to be in the film while tripping gets free shrooms.
I might have been the first person in 2015 to throw up on a yellow cab before climbing in it.
Not gonna lie: had to look up how to spell fellatio. Not sure I spelled it right even now. Looks like a Shakespearean character. ENTER FELLATIO, SOLILOQUIZING.
I just walked out of the side door of the bar to come in the front door so no one would know I've been here drinking before our work meeting.
Still alive. Just brushed my teeth with fireball.
I have four things I would like to do over summer too... Problem is they're all roommates
Fuck you, i'm all jacked up on bananas lets go somewhere
So I figured it out. There's two types of shitters. Moaners and grunters. And on occasion there's a third. It's the ill fabled grunt moaner.
all my friends are getting married and here i am in a committed relationship with rum
Randomize
