On a scale of affliction to ed hardy, how douchy is in there right now?
Got a plan. Ill do rock paper scissors and if you win we smoke a joint. Throw rock.
You totally narrated your dogs thoughts for 2 and a half hours last night, and I was enthralled. I didn't say one word, I just listened.
He just kept yelling woof and then threw money all over me...
Is it bad that we're talking like nothing happened?
Ah. Blossoming love after wild blackout drunk sex.
Also I'm 95 percent positive we ate food naked together
Her hair goes down to her lower back and nobody was there to held it back for her. She looked like chewbacca dipped in vomit.
Well last time he got out of rehab he lasted 6 hours. So 3 days this time is quite an accomplishment.
I've decided I'm gonna attack people with the toilet plunger.
Thanks to you and Ketel One I now have a court summons with the actual word "frolicking" on it.
You were so proud of your stupid "magic trick" but all you did was piss on the couch. don't talk to me for a few days.
I'm just going to take the mature adult root and ignore him for a bit, and then pretend like I didn't see him jerking off.
he called me ma'am when we were fucking last night...he's five years older than me. I think I'm in love.
So I fell alseep while I was motorboating that girl last night infront of the entire party.
He just fucked me into paralysis. can't feel my hands or face.
Randomize
