Smith looks like a guy that goes on a lot of first dates
Gte hit a new low, I took a poopnap, passed out mid poop on the toilet.
and after you realized your puke was bright blue, you started crying hysterically and screaming, "I DON'T WANT TO BE A SMURF!" no more uv blue for you.
just tried googling 24 hr taco bell and when i typed "24 hour" it autocompleted with fitness. buzzzz killllll
Good, she had spurs on her boots. That is a sign for instant herp attack.
yea. Don't mess. He will heal me. But my blowjobs will be historical.
wow thanks for pushing me towards an older man
you gotta start somewhere if you're going to be a trophy wife
mike is out of commission and cannot make breakfast. he's sitting with two frozen waffles on his face & smiling like an idiot.
Thanks for the Beyonce article. In other news, I just passed a man with the state of Florida tattooed on his face.
I mean, the night I fell out of that bus I made you pour vodka onto my wound to clean it, then duct taped a paper towel to my hand and kept drinking.
I ordered more beers for everyone but had to finish them all. I promptly went outside and projectile vomited in the street. Three times.
I thought my neighbors locked me out of the building. Then I remembered I was drunk. PUSH AND TURN.
I don't care if it's 2 inches or 20 I mean dick is dick
It's not a walk of shame if you run
i'll...probably just offer you drugs?
i'll...probably take them in all honesty
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