I think god was stupid personally. The clit should be inside the vagina. Idiot.
So it wasn't until I came that he pointed out the glow in the dark plastic star still stuck to my forehead. Fun times.
you googled " I want to buy a live ostrich". I'd say you were pretty wasted.
Banging your ex-girlfriends best friend 3 days after you break up is like saying "fuck you" with feeling. I wouldnt have it any other way.
There are sesame seeds in my vagina. This cannot be explained with logic.
When she was dating that guy she told me If they broke up, I would receive a call and no matter what I was doing I'd have to go over a fuck her. It's like being an EMT for sex.
I ended up naked in a pond with you-know-who and your saying your a good babysitter? Dick.
He played the same pre-sex songs as his brother...
I'm sorry but I have WAY too many sex/ hookup related bruises on visible areas to be going home tmrw
That's how I like my men: traumatized and crying in a ball
...and that's why girls with IBS don't paint their nails
ive started thanking my toys after masturbating. might be time to get some fuck boys
I wore grinch underwear to my well woman exam this morning and I feel like I adulted successfully today.
I mean, I'm not upset that HE's getting married, I'm upset his penis has to go through with it by default
I remember you banged her while I was dying on your couch, so good call
Randomize
