You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
tonight lets celebrate not being married
how do i say, "my ex is going to be at this party so don't look like shit" without sounding like a bitch?
I'm going to email her once I get off the bathroom floor
You sucked on the drag queens heel. It got that rough.
Get caught with marijuana. Cop takes piece. Buy new bong. Circle of fun.
One good thing out of all this is her ass is huge. Like Australia Big.
those kids just got delivered to the party by the pizza guy
Worst walk of shame man. They had a fire drill at 7am, had to walk out of her all girl dorm wearing my Everday I'm Hustling sweater
Mike Pence got the fuck boy eyes though
At what point can I admit that I hate going to house parties?
I don't wanna stand in your shitty kitchen making small talk while I guard the quality booze I brought.
the hot lifeguard just pulled a McDonald's cheeseburger out of her fanny pack.
I did what i always do when i miss him; masturbate and watch Bridges of Madison County.
just spent the last 20 minutes cleaning out the soap dispenser. fuck. me. adderall.
Stacy was in the bathroom puking, so he peed out the window. We were eight stories up.
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