Cool, see you soon... she just admitted to her friends that it was a queef.
It's always exciting to touch a new boob.
Just donated money to a kid for her softball team.
Obviously I'm trying to futher our next generation of lesbians. I may be hitting on her at the gay bar in ten years...
Not only did I hold your hair back as you puked, i french braided it. I am such a great friend.
1. my parents still have sex. 2. being a screamer runs in the family. 3. so much so that i can tell what number of orgasms she's on. 4.so looks like i'm stuck outside a while
We both bought three foot bongs...going to race to see who can smoke a mile first.
3 things. 1) we need alcohol 2) we need alcohol 3) we need tortilla chips. Let's make a plan. Bro shakes and salsa.
My phone broke again .... im not really sure how im going 2 explain the teeth marks to the ppl at the Verizon store
I found someone's tooth on the stairs when I was vacuuming, and my sister found a catheter in the men's bathroom... this cleaning job is dangerous
Watching videos from last night and u go "I should be the president, I can get whatever I want w my tits"
New rule: I am no longer allowed to speak
Then that means he's outwardly conservative. Inwardly he's a total gay horndog. He's like a spy that can ruin conservative plans.
I want to change all my life goals to that.
He asked if I was going to squirt out my bday candles. I'm glad the perversion doesn't stop for special occasions.
These snow days are takeing a toll on my liver
Etiquette question... How do you tell your mother that her nipple is out in her fb profile picture?
It's like Guy Diamond blew glitter into my vagina.
Randomize